Real Life Stories
Permanent Pictures
A 14-year-old girl took and emailed a naked picture of herself to a boy she really liked at her school. The boy subsequently forwarded the image to numerous classmates and friends in the school.
What does this mean?
Adolescents can be manipulated to take and send nude/partially-clothed pictures or inappropriate videos of themselves. Adolescents may not realize that photos or videos can be reproduced, altered, posted online or sent to others without their permission. Once material is sent online, control over what happens with the material is lost, and subsequent exposure can be devastating.
What can I do?
Parents must try to stay involved and supervise their adolescent's online activities while still balancing their need for independence. Adolescents can appear very mature and ready to take on the world. However, teen brains are still developing and they do not have the capacity to properly deal with all situations. Even though adolescents may appear as though they can "handle" certain situations, they actually require and unconsciously seek adult guidance and supervision.
Reinforce the public nature of the Internet and let your adolescent know you will supervise online activity. Know their passwords, screen names, and the friends they are communicating with online.
It's important for parents to stay emotionally connected to their adolescent, and pay close attention to any significant changes in behaviour. Ensure your adolescent understands that s/he can talk to you about anything without fear of losing computer privileges.
Explain to your adolescent that s/he should never comply with threats. If someone threatens her/him online, s/he needs to tell a safe adult. Make sure your adolescent knows to stop any conversation that is uncomfortable and tell a safe adult.
Explain how experimenting in a public place like the Internet can have irreversible, embarrassing consequences.
Encourage open communication and be aware of your adolescent's sensitivity to social judgment. S/he may be hesitant to share personal experiences.
Discuss online and offline high-risk behaviour and create "what if" scenarios together to help your adolescent recognize dangerous situations and practice responses.
Discuss dignity and self-respect and how it can be preserved or destroyed by messages/photos/videos sent online.
Discuss the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships.
Teach your adolescent that it is illegal for people to manufacture, possess or distribute naked or sexually explicit pictures of children under 18 years of age.
Check out our Popular Activities section for more information on technologies being used by adolescents and how to make them safer, and our Healthy Relationships section, and our Manipulative Relationships section to learn more about subtle forms of manipulation and how you can talk to your adolescent about these.