Real Life Stories
Sexting
Cybertip.ca received a report with regard to a 15-year-old girl who was involved in a sexual relationship with a 19-year-old man. The man was sending naked pictures of himself via text message to the girl and requesting that she perform sexual acts for him on webcam and send it to him.
What does this mean?
In manipulative relationships, adolescents can be coerced to take and send nude/partially-clothed pictures or inappropriate videos of themselves. Adolescents may not realize that photos or videos they send can be reproduced, altered, posted online or sent to others without their permission, and that once a photo or video is sent, they have no control over where it goes. Also, with cell phones and texting, youth may be exposed to sexually explicit content.
With cell phones and texting, personal boundaries can be crossed earlier, and very personal, sometimes sexual comments or questions can be raised. With this technology, relationships can progress faster than they normally would. This is further complicated by adolescents being connected and reachable 24 hours a day on their cell phone.
What can I do?
Teach students about the public nature of text messaging. What they text to someone can be shared with anyone. To avoid potentially uncomfortable situations, stress the importance of being very careful about what they include in a text message. Also stress that students should never send pictures/video of themselves from their cell phones.
Explain to students how experimenting in a public place like the Internet can have irreversible, embarrassing consequences.
Encourage open communication and be aware of students' sensitivity to social judgment. They may be hesitant to share personal experiences.
Discuss with students online and offline high-risk behaviour and create "what if" scenarios with them to help them recognize dangerous situations and practice responses.
Discuss with students dignity and self-respect and how it can be preserved or destroyed by messages/photos/videos sent online.
Discuss with students the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships.
Teach students that it is illegal for people to manufacture, possess or distribute naked or sexually explicit pictures of children under 18 years of age.
Explain to students that they should tell a safe adult if threatened over the phone or through a text message to do something they don’t want to do.
Teach students to trust their instincts — that if they feel a situation is potentially unsafe, it probably is.
Check out our Popular Activities section for more information on technologies being used by adolescents and how to make them safer, and our Healthy Relationships section, and Unhealthy Relationships section. Learn more about subtle forms of manipulation and how you can talk to students about these.